Okay, part of it is my own fault. I never paid attention to romance and I never went on dates in high school. I never thought I'd need it, and it wasn't interesting enough to study on its own merits. Plus, I thought it would be setting myself up for disappointment -- I can't miss what I never knew.
But, now that I have the interest, it's kind of awkward to be acting like a somewhat better-mattered teenage boy. I already know I'm so much younger than Kattarrin, and being inexperienced makes it feel a bit worse -- I mean, I know I wouldn't want to date a teenager, so I don't see why she would.
Dinner was fine -- I was able to pretend like it was just any other evening meal with a friend. But, now, we were walking back to our rooms, date nearly over, and I was suddenly hyper-aware of the fact. What do wood elves do at the end of dates anyway? I barely know what modern American humans do.
"You're being quiet," Katt said.
"I'm just thinking." I told her.
"About?" She smiled, that sort of impish smile she had when someone did something amusing.
"Nothing much. Tonight I guess." We were nearly at the stairwell where we'd part ways. "It's almost over."
"Have a good time?"
"I suppose I did. It was interesting." We paused, taking up a good portion of the hallway. I wasn't really certain what to do next -- I mean, I couldn't follow her to her room. That would be very creepy on a first date. On the other hand, I was... well, I was having fun, even being the most uncertain of what I was doing that I have been for a while.
"Interesting good, or interesting bad?"
"Oh, the good kind of interesting." I added that to the list of stupid things I said that evening. I sounded like some kind of eager fifteen year old. "But, I guess I should stay good night and let you get your rest." I shifted my weight suddenly very conscious of myself. Would she get upset if I tried to kiss her? How does one even broach that subject anyway?
I must have paused for longer than I thought. Katt was grinning at me. "Zack? You okay?"
"Oh. Yes, I'm fine." I smile at her, somewhat self-consciously.
"Could you crouch down a bit for me."
I did so, enough so that my head was level with hers. It was a bit of a relief, even if it proved that once again, I was in the remedial class when it came to women. "Like this?"
"Exactly like that." She leaned forward and kissed me, and I tried my hardest not to look like any more of an idiot than I already had.